10 Comments
User's avatar
Michele Miles Gardiner's avatar

Yes, the "Do you have a girlfriend yet? question is a teen-mortifier that'll make any kid want to stay at a family wobbly card table, for sure.

"Have your pubes grown in yet?" by a drunk aunt made sure my stepson avoided future family functions, entirely.

Ryan Stohl's avatar

Love seeing a young prospect rise through the ranks. The scouting reports have been brutal this season. Although he didn’t thank God or deflect credit to his teammates, so I’m already questioning the kid’s character.

Next season, ESPN will assign a dedicated commentator to the kids’-table pipeline. Live coverage will be on ESPN2 immediately following Das Halbierungsspiel.

Chris Keilman's avatar

It's true. You gotta handle the yams.

Annie Wilson's avatar

I'm going to need a follow-up with Ted after Christmas dinner. Full play-by-play.

Friend of the Creator's avatar

Dang, this Ted kid is definitely my first draft pick. He thinks fast on his feet, very promising.

White Squirrel's Nest's avatar

Those of us listening to everyone else talk about their good jobs & home ownership. “Can I rejoin the kid table?” Also the kid realizing the conversation is mostly about health problems & people's divorces.

Kelsey Elizabeth's avatar

Anyone else in their 30s still sitting at the kids' table?

Jesse Kubanet's avatar

"I thought they were yucky" really hit for me

Charles Robert Jones's avatar

"Grown-ups hate phones, especially at the dinner table."

What alternative universe does this take place in? All of my relatives are constantly scrolling Facebook at family get-togethers.

lchristopher's avatar

The Onion did it better.